A year ago my husband had a stroke. Our relationship changed. He became more dependent and I stepped up to take on more responsibilities. We transitioned into the new ways relatively well. I became his Uber driver, day planner, prompter on memory issues, handled all his meds and insulin and kept track of doctor appointments. Throughout the year I still sought the answer to the cause of his extreme fatigue.
A month ago the answer came. He needed open heart surgery to take care of several issues. It was a whirlwind month of preparations. The things you need to do before a serious operation, like taking care of legal papers, making decisions and spending extra time with family and friends. We celebrated his 73rd birthday the weekend before surgery date. It was also our last family gathering in our home of 38 years. The downsize move became a TO DO when we learned he needed open heart surgery. Yet while we spent our evening eating, laughing, praying and crying our family looked forward to new beginnings in a lovely home we’ve been preparing for some time.
A week ago my husband walked bravely into the hospital to submit to a very serious surgery. While I had perfect peace he would be fine, it is still hard to go through the journey. The surgery was successful. He has had complications of needing an external pace maker which impeded him getting out of bed all week. His breathing and dependency on oxygen has been a critical issue. Other critical issues occurred on the home front. Our new home had a water mishap that damaged two rooms of carpet and hallway hardwood. We still moved but put our Furnishings and belongings in the garage and sunroom. Our lives are temporarily split between two houses because being completely settled now is not possible.
A day ago my husband received a internal pacemaker. The procedure went well. He is able to start moving. His lungs need it.
Today he stood up like a warrior. He walked. He is fighting. I am proud of him.
I have found myself between my fear and my faith many times in the last year. I choose faith. I take one day at a time. God is in control especially when things seem so out of control. Like last week. Even when the days are long and the nights are short. To God be the glory, great things He has done.
Just give me Jesus.
Always trusting.
